Happy Valentine’s Day

Angelism: “Love comes in many forms. Always love yourself first so that you can be open to love others. Welcome love in your life, for when it’s real it can truly help you evolve into a better person.” 
In the spirit of Valentine’s Day I want to celebrate love. Not just my love for a significant other, but the love that that I share with family, friends, children, neighbors, Facebook buddies, coworkers, pets, and all who are dear to my heart. I always say, my religion is love. I can’t imagine life without it. 
For some of you, this may not be a Valentine’s Day filled with wine, food, long stem roses, and love poems. There is nothing wrong with that. Instead share your love with people you appreciate and are grateful for. All of us are still kids inside who love a sweet treat or card from someone who cares. If you wish to receive love, think first about how you are giving it. If you have a lover, love them even more today. Set aside any resentments, eliminate negative thoughts, and show your lover on Valentine’s Day some unconditional love. Whining about not getting gifts from your partner or punishing them for a lack of effort will kill any possibility of a special day. If you are feeling lonely or desperate stop now. Being single is a wonderful thing. Take the day to love yourself. Buy yourself some flowers, go to a spa or get some of your favorite chocolates. Plan quality time with a friend, family member or coworker. Get yourself out there and share the special day positively. If you are in limbo because you sort of have a date, but you’re not sure since it may just be a bootie-call, then I beg of you to get your head out of you ass and get it together. If you have a shady lover in your life, and you don’t know by now if they want to spend Valentine’s Day with you, then guess what? They don’t want to spend Valentine’s Day with you. Make other plans! Don’t sit by the phone, wait by the door, or stalk your favorite hang-out, hoping to hear from a Valentine. Move on and celebrate Valentine’s Day with those who are deserving of your love and attention. 
Happy Valentine’s Day to all of you. May your day be full of LOVE! 

My Time of the Month SUCKS!

Angelism: “Whoever invented the female period is an asshole!”

I assume you know exactly what I am talking about when I say, “My time of the month SUCKS!” Most women have this in common for about 40+ dreadful years. Every month I get a visit and if I didn’t I’d shit my pants as my life would change forever; kids are not in my plan. If you are at all confused, I’m referring to my monthly period. The awful weeklong bloodbath in my pants is also known as: Aunt Flow, The Rag, Shark Week, The Dreaded Dragon, TOM (time of month), The Crimson Wave, The Bloody Mary, In Heat, The Curse, and lastly but most classy, Riding the White Pony. All very sexy don’t you think? I never realized how quickly 21 days can go by until day 21 creeps up on me, leaving me so bloated the buttons on my pants feel pressure to rip open, and my boobs can barely be stuffed into my roomiest of bras. Going up an entire cup size overnight the day or two before my period sucks! Great for my boyfriend, he thinks it’s awesome, however during this time I want him to stay as far away as possible since my boobs feel like a pile of bricks. I shove myself in a bra and pray to not have a tri-tit explosion out of the top of my shirt as it would be highly inappropriate at work. Finish these symptoms off with stabbing cramps, gas, zits, the shits, and an overall hormone and odor change, and YUM, I think that’s a recipe for a great date night? NOPE! Time to cancel my plans. FML!!! 
My crankiness aside, having a period in my opinion is truly a curse. PMS and everything that goes with it is awful. We go an average of four decades dealing with this shit, keeping the maxi pad and tampon industry in business, just for the option to have children. It’s feeling unfair to me, especially since I don’t want kids. As much as I respect our higher power, I’m not sure what God was smoking when he put this plan in place. Clearly he had too much wine that night and was very upset with women. The average American family has something like 2.6 kids. Hmmm, so you get to tough through a period every month for 40+ years to be pregnant for maybe two or three years of your life? Even if it takes you a few tries to get knocked up, even back in the day when we didn’t live as long… 40 years of baby making potential?!?! Eff you! This process is proof that the female body a fucking machine. Screw hunting and building a house boys; a woman is a super-human, baby making machine for four decades, bleeding a week straight for 12 weeks out of every year, all with the potential to nourish life with our big fat boobies! Top that bullshit! 

Maybe the PMS hormone imbalances that lead to a woman’s crazed moments truly are to make men insane. If that’s the case then great, something has to wake them up to experience the hell we face on a bad cramp day. Shit gets done when Shark Week arrives or somebody dies! I think many of you know exactly where I’m coming from on this. Please tell me I’m not alone!!!

Surviving the Race

Angelism: “Every step in life has its moment. It might be your first step, your last, your easiest step or your most challenging one. Whether it is a step up, step down, or a step to the side, no matter what kind of step, enjoy what it brings to your story. Every step you take is a memory that shapes your personal journey in life.” 
Life has challenges every day. Many challenges we take on to prove something to ourselves that we were not sure was possible. Back in the fall, one of my best-friends since high-school signed up for a half marathon. I instantly thought she was crazy. When she called to share the news I got excited for her but still thought she had no clue what she was getting herself into. This friend of mine, who rarely asks me for anything, insisted that I help motivate her. She knew I worked out regularly and wanted me to hold her accountable. Wanting to be there for her I said, “Yes!” I even offered to train with her. She was thrilled and sent me the run schedule. I was officially in for 12 weeks of torture!
Now, I live in Los Angeles and my friend resides in Houston. My promise to her was to train with her side by side so we could tackle the workout plan together. I knew this was a promise I would soon regret, but I wanted to stay committed. Having attempted to train for a half marathon in my past, I knew she would start to feel defeated around the 8-10 mile mark. This meant I had to stay strong especially at the end. After a few weeks of training I had a crazy idea. I thought how great it would be if I could fly out there and do this with her. From that point on, I worked to figure out a way to get to Houston and spend this memorable event with her.
Luckily her husband was on board with this idea, as well as my boyfriend and another dear friend of ours. We agreed it would be a surprise, she would be clueless, and we would give her the shock of her life. Scared the secret would be exposed, we kept it on the down-low from our friends and family. Successfully keeping it hush-hush, we arrived the Friday before the race and she had no idea anything was up. I pretended to be at work texting her about my stressful day, when all along I was really eating lunch with her hubby down the street from her office in Houston. We decided we would hide in her closet when she got home. When she drove up we took our place in the dark closet like little kids playing hide and go seek. She came in the house after a long day at work, she went to her closet to change (thinking her hubby was taking her out to dinner), and BAM! There the three of us were, screaming and running out of the closet to surprise her and support her on her special day. She was shocked!!! She put her hands over her face and cried – we cried, we laughed, she asked questions, and we cried some more. When the shock wore off we hugged, we jumped for joy, we acted like kids and we all agreed that moment will forever be a highlight in our life. This experience reminded me how important it is to do things like this for those you love. Life is all about moments and when you can have one that feels this good, an instant feeling of raw emotion that creates a warm and fuzzy feeling inside your heart, it is worth all the effort to make it happen. We were all floating on a cloud of happy.
Now that the fun of the surprise was over, we had to face the race. Sunday morning was brutal. We were up at 4am, we spent an hour in the car driving to the race location, and then we weaseled our way through the thousands of people to get ready for the half marathon. Our nerves were at an all time high. We had sweaty palms and goosebumps because we wanted so badly to do well. We were scared to death at how hard the next few hours would be. We heard the stories of people passing out, throwing up, peeing themselves, and tripping and scraping up their bodies. We knew that a rash in the bra and crotch area was likely as were blisters on our feet. Through the fear we had one main goal: TO FINISH THE RACE! Our second goal: TO NOT STOP RUNNING! I am thrilled to report: “MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!” We came in under the 12 minute mile goal we set for ourselves and we never stopped running once. We were overwhelmed with gratitude to have accomplished this challenge together. We crossed that finish line and the tears poured out as the leg pain set in. We did it! 13.1 miles complete!
I learned that committing to push yourself harder than you ever have before is very frightening. The doubt, fear and pain that creeps up in your head while you run for hours on end is a mental mind-fuck every step of the way. The will and motivation to finish is there but the desire to give up and quit haunts you. Neither of us wanted to let each other down, so we both pushed hard not just for ourselves but for each-other. I am blessed that we survived the race in one piece. I am more blessed that I have a friend who has been with me in every step of my life. This race represented to me that no matter how many steps I take in life, no matter how hard my challenges get, or how scared I am to do the things I want to do, I am not alone. Our commitment to get through life together will always be there. Thank you BFFF!!! And thank you NIKE for shoes that stood the test of time!!!

 

Needed a Break!

Angelism: “Need a break? Take a break. Only you can know when you must slow down.” 

It has been a long time since my last post. Life took a few twists and turns, many that I was not expecting but I welcomed the change. Needless to say I began using my skills 40 hours a week at a desk job which officially lead to writers block. I lost touch on Angelisms, quit checking in with my Facebook following, shut down my Myspace page (I think everyone has done that by now LOL!), and basically lost interest in blogging. In the back of my head I always knew I would get back to writing. I simply needed to focus on my new work projects, take time to travel, spend quality time with my friends and family and well, do anything but blog. With it being a new year, I am ready to make my comeback tour and start sharing again as I have missed it. At what speed I will post who knows but we shall see how it goes.
I don’t know how 2012 was for all of you but it flew by for me. It seems the older I get the quicker the holidays go. It felt like one day I was cooking a Thanksgiving feast and the next day I was taking down holiday decorations and making New Years resolutions. I decided this year that Christmas is only fun and magical for children, the adults who have children, and grandparents. If you don’t get to play Santa and make a child’s wishes come true, I officially think it’s more work than it’s worth. During the holidays there is so much going on; the holiday parties, the gift buying and making time to give the gifts, the cards to send out to everyone you know as well as those who send you one that you were not expecting, making sure you don’t offend anyone by leaving them off a guest list, and being extra sensitive as the holidays bring out people’s crazy emotions. IT CAN BE OVERWHELMING! This extra workload kinda made me say, “The hell with Christmas!” Now I came to this commentary after Christmas when I had only $5 bucks in my checking account and I had gained seven pounds in 30 days. I think my Grinch-like attitude may have more to do with feeling fat, lazy and broke. Getting fat is another depressing struggle during the “be merry” season. Next December, I want to be a kid! Kids don’t think about their waistline when they are eating their third slice of pie for the day. Needless to say, I am glad the holidays are behind me and I can start fresh; like on a treadmill with a paycheck I get to keep! 
For those of you that might read this after all my time away, I want to wish you a very happy 2013. My hope is that it is a good year for all. May it also be free of stupid people crossing my path on a daily basis. 🙂