I Believe…

Angelism: What you believe identifies your truth. Belief is as open or as limited as you allow it to be. Belief can change at any moment if you choose to think differently.

 
I believe that life is not fair. I am not owed anything nor should I expect anything.
I believe I should always leave loved ones with loving words, I never know if that will be my last goodbye.
 
I believe I don’t have to change friends to understand that friends can change.
I believe that it will take a long time to become the person I want to be.
I believe no matter how hard I love, I will be hurt. Forgive and move on is the only healthy option.
I believe that I am responsible for the opinions others have of me. I choose how much weight I give to those opinions.
I believe I can do something in one moment of time that will change the course of my life forever.
I believe I can keep going long after I think I can’t.
I believe either I control my attitude or my attitude will control me.
I believe that money is a shitty way to keep score in life.
I believe that I should not place value on my things. What I have today may be gone tomorrow.
I believe that I have the right to be angry, but that does not give me the right to be cruel.
I believe that no matter how sad I become, or how crushed my heart may be, the world will not stop for my grief.
I believe that maturity is a state of mind, one I can turn on and off when needed.
I believe that my upbringing influenced who I am, but I am responsible for who I become.
I believe two people can look at he exact same thing and see it completely different.
I believe I can have all the degrees in the world but that’s not what makes me a smart / good human.
I believe that a total stranger can have a huge impact on my life.
I believe that keeping secrets weighs heavy on the soul. I also believe discovering secrets weighs heavy on the soul.
I believe that sometimes the people I am closest to take the most advantage of my generosity.
I believe that life is a gift, one that I am grateful for even on the toughest of days.
I believe that getting old sucks! My days are numbered no matter how hard I fight to stay young.
I believe that often the people I least expect to show up for me do.
I believe that I must believe in myself if I want others to believe in me.
I believe that I will do what I feel has to be done regardless of the consequences.
I believe in the greater good but accept that evil exists among us.
I believe that organized religion is not the only way to practice faith. It is possible to have relationship with a higher power outside of the rules of church.
I believe that I will make mistakes and that I will learn from them.
I believe in the power of love and giving.
I believe that there is only one race and that is HUMAN. We are all HUMAN and that is why we are all more alike than different.
I believe that if you agree you should share this with your friends… XO

Shit Happens!

Angelism: “You are not above things going wrong in your life. Get over yourself & accept that shit happens & it’s OK.”

 
Life is an interesting roller-coaster of highs and lows. Most people want love, happiness, and financial stability, yet so many people get lost in the stress of life and the instant gratification of negativity. People race through days allowing themselves to get overwhelmed by little things like a flat tire, a cell phone that breaks, or a pizza delivery that runs late. This proves to me that as Americans we are spoiled. People want more stuff and exciting new adventures. The focus is on what we want and the importance of having it a certain way rather than using our energy to appreciate life and its daily struggles. As Americans we are surrounded by so much greatness and opportunity, we are raised knowing that our dreams can become reality, however it’s important to keep in mind that SHIT WILL HAPPEN. The sooner we can accept that not everything will go our way, the happier life will be for all.
I’m always in awe at how stressed out a person can become over a computer that crashes, a remote control that dies, or a cell phone that breaks. I laugh when people roll their eyes in line at the grocery store as if their time is more important than the few people in front of them. Even more entertaining is when drivers flip people the bird all because they are shocked and bugged by having to share their public street space with someone they consider a horrible driver. Get over yourself!
We are all in a world experiencing life. People have the ability to dream and believe in perfection which can be our enemy. We have the need for more things to prove our success and establish our importance. Many people run around with built up negative energy, complaining about anything and everything that doesn’t go as expected because we want to control our dream for a perfect environment. We get flustered every time a little shit happens. I truly believe that real strength and intelligence comes from the people who accept that all that can happen, will happen, some good and some bad. You may be annoyed that your car broke down, but why wouldn’t it? It’s a car, it can fail. Do you think you are more deserving than others, and that your vehicle should always run perfectly and someone else should have to deal with car trouble instead? Are you above shit happening to you?
I’ve learned that not all days are fair and some good days turn bad just by taking a call or reading an email. I’ve spent the last decade trying to embrace shit happening. When things start to go opposite of the way I want them to, I start creating a plan to fix it. I do vent, stress, get annoyed and wish things were different, but a full on meltdown and “poor me, I’m a victim” attitude is never my route. When I see that shit is happening I grab an ass-wipe and start cleaning it up. The other option is to sit in the shit and be miserable which may be worth it for some but not for me. Next time shit happens in your life, I hope you see the bright side of the crap and process it nicely.

Mediocre Sex Is A Problem

Angelism: “Never be so busy that your vagina has to suffer neglect!”



The busy day passes and most of you go to bed and think, “All I did today was do for others.” Many things get in the way of you making time for yourself; long work days, kids that suck the life out of you, friends and family that take but never give back, and the big one a mate who continuously puts their needs above yours. All of this leaves you tired and bitter at the end of the night. You go most days giving and giving to others but not taking the time to fuel yourself up. It’s no wonder your sex life is mediocre.
By definition mediocre means: of only moderate quality; ordinary. Ladies please tell me you are not settling for ordinary when you can have extraordinary. This is not healthy. If you are not having an orgasm at least three times a week, I said, “THREE TIMES A WEEK,” you are withholding your female body from a pleasure it truly deserves. You work daily, play hard, socialize often, lack sleep, and put others needs before yours. Your vagina wants attention too. Just like you should get in three workouts a week, you need the intimate, rewarding, healthy, beneficial joy of an orgasm a few times a week. Feed your soul and make time for your sexuality to exist.
Never forget that sex is fun. It’s exciting and it satisfies the body in numerous ways. With every kiss, unexpected touch, and sexual experience you feel a tingle in your body that is thrilling. It’s the good feelings of intimacy that you should strive for and work to maintain. The teasing, love taps, hugs, smooches, communication, and desire to please one another will make you a happier woman and a more satisfied couple. If you are dealing with a non-existent or mediocre sex life, I encourage you to work at being a foxy, happy, climaxing, and full of fun woman.
This blog is not only for couples. The fact is I have learned that you are often your best sexual partner. A satisfying sex life does not have to include a mate. Now you may be thinking, “What is she talking about? I’m my own best partner?” To which I say, “Yes honey you are!” There are going to be times when you have a dry spell. During these times, if you know how to pleasure yourself you can go long term without sexual contact and not feel deprived. The goal here is to focus on turning your mediocre sex life into a weekly, rewarding, fun, and healthy one, whether it’s with someone or not. Give it a try, the benefits are worth it.

Surviving the Race

Angelism: “Every step in life has its moment. It might be your first step, your last, your easiest step or your most challenging one. Whether it is a step up, step down, or a step to the side, no matter what kind of step, enjoy what it brings to your story. Every step you take is a memory that shapes your personal journey in life.” 
Life has challenges every day. Many challenges we take on to prove something to ourselves that we were not sure was possible. Back in the fall, one of my best-friends since high-school signed up for a half marathon. I instantly thought she was crazy. When she called to share the news I got excited for her but still thought she had no clue what she was getting herself into. This friend of mine, who rarely asks me for anything, insisted that I help motivate her. She knew I worked out regularly and wanted me to hold her accountable. Wanting to be there for her I said, “Yes!” I even offered to train with her. She was thrilled and sent me the run schedule. I was officially in for 12 weeks of torture!
Now, I live in Los Angeles and my friend resides in Houston. My promise to her was to train with her side by side so we could tackle the workout plan together. I knew this was a promise I would soon regret, but I wanted to stay committed. Having attempted to train for a half marathon in my past, I knew she would start to feel defeated around the 8-10 mile mark. This meant I had to stay strong especially at the end. After a few weeks of training I had a crazy idea. I thought how great it would be if I could fly out there and do this with her. From that point on, I worked to figure out a way to get to Houston and spend this memorable event with her.
Luckily her husband was on board with this idea, as well as my boyfriend and another dear friend of ours. We agreed it would be a surprise, she would be clueless, and we would give her the shock of her life. Scared the secret would be exposed, we kept it on the down-low from our friends and family. Successfully keeping it hush-hush, we arrived the Friday before the race and she had no idea anything was up. I pretended to be at work texting her about my stressful day, when all along I was really eating lunch with her hubby down the street from her office in Houston. We decided we would hide in her closet when she got home. When she drove up we took our place in the dark closet like little kids playing hide and go seek. She came in the house after a long day at work, she went to her closet to change (thinking her hubby was taking her out to dinner), and BAM! There the three of us were, screaming and running out of the closet to surprise her and support her on her special day. She was shocked!!! She put her hands over her face and cried – we cried, we laughed, she asked questions, and we cried some more. When the shock wore off we hugged, we jumped for joy, we acted like kids and we all agreed that moment will forever be a highlight in our life. This experience reminded me how important it is to do things like this for those you love. Life is all about moments and when you can have one that feels this good, an instant feeling of raw emotion that creates a warm and fuzzy feeling inside your heart, it is worth all the effort to make it happen. We were all floating on a cloud of happy.
Now that the fun of the surprise was over, we had to face the race. Sunday morning was brutal. We were up at 4am, we spent an hour in the car driving to the race location, and then we weaseled our way through the thousands of people to get ready for the half marathon. Our nerves were at an all time high. We had sweaty palms and goosebumps because we wanted so badly to do well. We were scared to death at how hard the next few hours would be. We heard the stories of people passing out, throwing up, peeing themselves, and tripping and scraping up their bodies. We knew that a rash in the bra and crotch area was likely as were blisters on our feet. Through the fear we had one main goal: TO FINISH THE RACE! Our second goal: TO NOT STOP RUNNING! I am thrilled to report: “MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!” We came in under the 12 minute mile goal we set for ourselves and we never stopped running once. We were overwhelmed with gratitude to have accomplished this challenge together. We crossed that finish line and the tears poured out as the leg pain set in. We did it! 13.1 miles complete!
I learned that committing to push yourself harder than you ever have before is very frightening. The doubt, fear and pain that creeps up in your head while you run for hours on end is a mental mind-fuck every step of the way. The will and motivation to finish is there but the desire to give up and quit haunts you. Neither of us wanted to let each other down, so we both pushed hard not just for ourselves but for each-other. I am blessed that we survived the race in one piece. I am more blessed that I have a friend who has been with me in every step of my life. This race represented to me that no matter how many steps I take in life, no matter how hard my challenges get, or how scared I am to do the things I want to do, I am not alone. Our commitment to get through life together will always be there. Thank you BFFF!!! And thank you NIKE for shoes that stood the test of time!!!

 


Positive thoughts can change your life…

Angelism: “Life can’t get you down if your positive thoughts lift you up!”

Recently a courageous friend on Facebook, who is struggling with new challenges in life, asked if I could write about positive thoughts and how it relates to healing. I was thrilled that this came up as a subject of choice. I’m happy to write about something I believe strongly in. The idea is that thoughts create and control our reality.
When I was younger, in my teenage years and early twenties, I never thought much about what I said or did. I knew I was happy, I liked having fun, and I felt very fortunate. Through life experiences, friends and family dramas, relationship lows, deaths and financial constraints, I have confirmed for myself that every situation is as good or bad as I allow it to be in my head. Every experience can be embraced, accepted, and made sense of, if I manage it correctly in my mind. I shape the outcome of every experience. It starts with my thoughts and ends with my commitment to maintain the positive thoughts and delete the negative ones.
It is easy to be a downer. Many of us go day after day complaining about the bad driver in front of us, not having enough time, scared about our unloving companion, frustrated from our nagging family and friends, and infuriated because of the increasing prices and bad economy. We fill our space and energy with something we know we have in common with every human in existence -the ability to complain. Complaining is a given. Stand next to someone in Starbucks and if you so much as roll your eyes or suggest in any way that it’s taking forever, the person behind you will likely say, “It’s annoying, they are always slow here.”
What would it take to be positive? How hard is it for you? People across the world are becoming more aware of the gift of a good attitude. The idea that you become your thoughts is proving to be true. With books like, The Secret, The Power of Now, and A Complaint Free World, we are reassured that positive thoughts result in a good outcome. You think about what you want, you vision it, and you get it. Controlling your mind to think in a way that is beneficial to you, and being aware of your words so that you no longer speak in a disrespectful way towards yourself, can really pay off.
So does positive thinking have the ability to heal us? YES. Many doctors agree that an ill patient who has a positive attitude and a strong will to fight, is going to do better than the patient who takes the news of an illness to heart and sees it as a life sentence. Doctors have confirmed that the major contributors to maintaining good health and removing disease from the body is a positive, hopeful and determined outlook from the patient. Words that you speak to yourself become a reality, so an ill person who speaks positively towards their body during a crisis, can actually reverse the negative situation creating quality health and healing for their body and mind.
Now chances are if you have just been diagnosed with breast cancer you are not going to run home and start talking words of gratitude about your situation. Every major negative experience deserves its moment of fear, depression and upset. However the sooner you move through those thoughts and create a plan of action to make positive changes, the healthier and stronger you will become.
If you don’t believe this concept to be true, I beg of you to give it a try. First become aware of every negative thought you say or think. Before you actually speak any harshness in this world, see if you can replace it with something beneficial and productive. Instead of complaining about the slow service at Starbucks, can you appreciate the extra time you have in line to play with the adorable baby that is in the stroller in front of you? Can you offer up a compliment to someone to fill the noise in which you would usually use to complain? Also if you have an illness, I ask that you challenge yourself to move past its limitations. Think your way out of being sick and see if you begin to feel better.
People who live with a strong mind, positive attitude and peace in their hearts have been known to practice many of the following habits. You may want to read up on these ideas individually to fully understand how all this can work for you. It’s also good to start trying some of these concepts and see if you can slowly change your life for the better.
Habits of positive people:
*Speak only kind words
*Read motivational and inspiring books
*Embrace each new day with good thoughts
*Write in a gratitude journal daily
*Live in the moment, listen and have awareness
*Be thankful for all things good and bad
*Think positively about finances and trust it will work out
*Surround yourself with joyful things; art, flowers, books, music and more
*Have goals/dreams and trust they can be achieved
*Pay it forward
*Surround yourself with love and positive people
*Meditate and exercise
*Eat well and take care of your health
*Be free of judgment
*Love yourself and feed your soul
*Respect your negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones immediately
I want to thank my friend on Facebook who encouraged me to write this. I admire your willingness to give me feedback. To all of you who read this, I hope you are on this path of greatness, and if not, I encourage you to make a conscious decision today to start changing the way you think.

Two Sides of My Soul

Angelism: “I choose happy because happy is a choice.”

Today I bring up an interesting topic, a way of looking inside your soul that you may have not thought of before. I have always felt that I have two lives. You might be thinking that I’m living in the dark under two different names not sure of who I am. Not the case. However I have discovered that I have a bad life and a good life. I’m well aware of my existence and the twists and turns it’s taken, but what I’m most fascinated with is my ability to choose one life over the other. It’s as if my soul knows the feeling of two personalities but chooses one.
I was raised by a variety of people. My parents, grandparents, teachers, neighbors, extended family, acquaintances in the workplace, and friends, all played a part in the person that I have become. Books and prayer have also influenced me at certain times in my life. Even TV has helped my personality grow. Thanks to kind-hearted individuals like Oprah, I believe that the world can be a better place. It’s these relationships and experiences that have helped mold me to think the way I do and for that I am ever so grateful.
I’ve learned that the world is filled with two kinds of people: the positive (uppers) and the negative (downers). No matter how hard I try to be good, I’ll always be surrounded by someone or something that wants to bring me down. I know that it’s my choice to live one of these two ways. Unfortunately, good and bad things happen regardless of my efforts. It can be challenging to get through the day when you know it’s all up to chance and that what’s here one minute, could be gone the next.
Because of my consistent happy and outgoing personality, I don’t get much sympathy from others. This is mainly my doing because I don’t seek it. If there is a problem, I find a solution. I don’t dwell for long nor do I bring others down with me. Since I have the ability to manage life without much comfort from others, what many people don’t realize is that I have been broken. Not just a few hits here and there, but truly emotionally and physically damaged. I can think of handfuls of events that got me so low I’m surprised I’m still standing. Life has brought me loss, pain, misfortune, anxiety, conflict, stress and disappointment. I have been let down, forgotten, lied to, mistreated, disowned and crapped on by people I cared for and trusted. In past moments of pure disappointment, I have acted evil and said and done things I am not proud of. I can easily wake up every day and dwell in my misery if I wanted to.
On the flip side I know I’m an amazing person. I have been blessed in numerous ways and any negative experience I have had, has taught me an important lesson. Many of the people who have let me down, have also lifted me up. That’s what I hold onto. I have experienced love, praise, support, commitment, fun, intimacy and adventure. I have people who truly believe in me and stand by all that I do. My family and friends, who I hold so dear, have proven that no matter what gets in the way nothing will break our bond. When I think of these positive moments in my life, times of pure laughter and joy, I am carried. I think, “How dare I ever put energy elsewhere.” Happy is my home and my heart. I have the gift of joy because I decided long ago to use my energy to love people and life and set boundaries with those who let me down and are a negative force. My faith, trust, love and vulnerability confirm for me that no matter what happens – life is good.
So how does one get through the confusion of good versus evil, love versus hate, rich versus poor, friend versus enemy and luck versus jinxed? The way I see it is you can be a victim or a hero. When you are a victim, a downer, or a negative person, everything you think and do comes out through you with a negative, mistrusting force. A victim believes life isn’t fair. They can’t maintain relationships or nurture healing. Their walls are so high that no matter how hard you try, you keep ending up in the same dysfunctional situations. Their dramatic, disrespectful and rude behavior gets the best of them. I understand this dark, ugly place. I have been there and know people who live there full-time. Many times I have asked, “Why must it be so hard? Why must you kick me when I’m down? Why don’t people understand and respect me?” I can go on for days with desperate questions that have no answers or I can embrace the positive side of my soul that heals all wounds. One of my favorite Angelisms quotes says, “I choose happy because happy is a choice.” Since happy is a choice, I want to appreciate my life and celebrate its ups and downs. I know in my heart and in my mind that this is the way life should be.
It’s easy to get lost in life, feel confused about emotions and wonder why you always get the short end of the stick. It’s easier to go with the crowd or side with those that are dramatic and negative than to take a stand for a positive thought. Gossip always comes quicker than praise. What’s even easier is to beat people to the punch. You might figure if you can point out your flaws and life struggles before they do, then it will hurt less. Most of us have a problem looking at ourselves in the mirror and being wholeheartedly proud of what we see. The result of that is living in anger and disappointment which doesn’t lead to a happy soul.
Some people would love to walk a day in my shoes and others would not try on a pair if I paid them. The important thing for me is knowing which pair of shoes to wear in this life. I can wallow in the 5-inch heels that cripple me, cause pains in my legs, feet and knees, and show something to others that I’m not proud of, or I can choose to wear my sneakers. I know for sure that it’s in my sneakers I am comfortable, free spirited and ready to soak in all that the world has to offer.
I understand the struggles of having the Devil on one shoulder and an Angel on the other. I, like many of you, have to pick which life to make my story. I won’t pretend that I wake up on the right side of the bed every morning. Those of you who follow my BLOGS know I like to complain and vent a time or two. No matter how tough a day in my life can get, at the end of the day I know I’m at peace. What I choose is what’s right for me. I make every effort to live my life with respect, honesty, love and heartfelt consideration. Many of my decisions are driven by my desire to have fun and be a free spirit. My life, if I analyze it, can go either way; victim or hero, good or bad, positive or negative. As you have learned, my soul chooses happy so I am my own hero. Which life do you choose?